Self-Worth After Trauma: What Every Woman Should Know
Healing after trauma isn’t just about feeling better. It’s about re-building your sense of self-worth and the life you had before trauma. Trauma took so much from you and gave you a life you didn’t choose. This kind of healing is hard. It takes courage – a courage that most people will never experience. So, I want to take a moment to acknowledge that and tell you that I am so proud of you for even thinking about your healing journey.
And on that note, I want to share the truths about self-worth I wish I had known while healing through my own trauma and slowly choosing a life that felt good.
1. What happened to you doesn’t define you.
For years I felt shame for what I went through. When my therapist told me that I wasn’t responsible for the actions of my ex, my mindset totally changed. I felt the heaviness of the shame lift.
We don’t like to share trauma or “bad things” that happened because we feel embarrassed. But we aren’t the ones that should be embarrassed.
When you stop looking at yourself as the problem or the one that did something wrong, you start seeing your worth again.
2. Your body remembers it all.
A car door slamming or a dog barking out of nowhere sends your body into panic. Even when you think you’re past what happened, your body remembers. Always being on edge and alert causes exhaustion and leads to burnout. And that makes healing hard.
The best things you can do are learn to listen to your body, slow down, and rest. This will start to show your body and your subconscious mind that you are safe and don’t always need to be on alert.
3. Healing doesn’t turn you into a new person. It re-builds who you are.
Healing doesn’t mean you won’t ever feel scared or emotional. But it helps you deal with those feelings from a more neutral place rather than survival.
It leads to you trusting yourself, learning to take up space, slowing down, choosing softness, and getting back to the life you want to build.
That’s self-worth.
4. You don’t have to earn rest, love, or peace.
Trauma took away your sense of safety. And because you’ve been afraid to share it with others, you’ve lost a sense of care and compassion, too. When you start healing and opening up, it’ll feel weird to feel those things again. This is when you trust the process.
Something I wish I had learned sooner – You’re worthy because you exist.
You don’t have to be enough or do more to be worthy of love and rest, and peace.
5. You’re allowed to build a life that makes sense for who you are now.
As you’re healing you may feel like the life you used to want doesn’t fit you anymore. That’s okay! That’s the growth that comes along with healing. Lean into it.
Healing is hard but on the other side is an opportunity to stretch yourself and become a version of yourself that you’re proud of.
Give yourself permission to pivot, evolve and build a life for the person that you are becoming.
If you’re healing, rebuilding, or trying to find your way back to yourself – I’m cheering for you.
In a world that celebrates overworking and avoids feelings you’re choosing to grow and be true to yourself. That’s something to be proud of.
If you want more support on this journey, you can download my Burnout Recovery Checklist or join my free group for women who are healing, growing, and taking their lives back one small step at a time. Follow me on Instagram and DM me to join the group!
You don’t have to do this alone.
